I just finished 'Cagebird' and now my face is all stained with tears. Damn this book! I feel incredibly silly now. Everyone thinks this is the worst book of the series and people tend to dislike Yuri as a main character - but damn.

I confess. I pitied him the whole thing. Everyone just says we're supposed to pity him and it's really forced, but GAH. Somehow I felt much more angry at Jos' self pity and Ryan's self pity than, say, Yuri cutting himself.

He started as a very 'cool' and witty MC, just later he starts to show how/why he became what he became. I can see perfectly how it works. I agree with people that while it explains Yuri's actions, it doesn't justify them, but it doesn't stop me from pitying him.

And you know what? Yuri and Finch's relationship was also damn forced, and it wouldn't be possible for Finch to be recognized as anything else but a plot device even if he had 'I am NOT Yuri's passport for redemption!' written all over his forehead with permanent markers. But they were cute and I ship it so hard. Specially when Yuri said he'd kill Finch slower and make it seems like he cared. Guh. That was cute.

This damned first person. It makes all our views biased. I hate everyone in the Warchild series but the narrator, though 'Burndive' made me irritated with Ryan, too.

Also, SQUICKS. I though I had NONE WHATSOEVER. I mean, I read 'Warchild' without even flinching at the torture scene. But when Estienne sleeps with Yuri for the first time in a 'job like' manner, I cried like a child because Estienne didn't seem to realize it was fucking rape. It made me so angry.

It's really funny because I can't stop thinking about my college because I have a test tomorrow that deals with similar subject (I mean crimes, not the main characters of a sci-fi trylogy being physically and mentally tortured). Gah. At least I think I'll do good, afterall, I spent the whole 'Cagebird' analyzing Yuri's case. (I guess I should've just stick to my freaking college book, I still have 100 pages more to read... I swear the more I read it the more it grows!)